Everyone wants love.

Unconditional. Passionate. Honest. Easy. Real.

You want that too, don’t you? I do.

We ALL should have this.

So, why don’t we?

We are looking for love in all the wrong places.

Many of my single friends are looking for the ideal partner. They search online and filter out those who are unattractive, never married, geographically undesirable, or can’t write a full sentence.

Some are lulled into the attraction of a younger man, and then wonder about his motivations.

Many are with long-term partners yet they struggle in getting the love, attention and respect they want.

Why is love so hard? Because…

True, honest, deep and unconditional love starts with you.
You are your own best lover.

(click to tweet)

If that thought just made you cringe, maybe it’s time to sit down and have a heart-to-heart and tell yourself what you really need to be happy.

1. Take a piece of paper and make two columns. Think of all the traits you want in a lover or partner:

Thoughtfulness
Compassion
Intelligence
Good looks
Fitness
Companionship
Passion
(make your own list)

2. Now turn these traits inward. How many of them do you actually give yourself? Make a check mark in the right hand column for each of these expressions of care that you actually bestow upon you.

Hmmm… interesting. Are you taking care of you as well as you want a partner to?

Or… Do you criticize yourself at every turn?  Do you sacrifice your happiness in favor of what others need?

3. Make a list of everything that makes you happy and feel loved. Now choose two or three from your list and make a promise to give these to yourself. My list might look something like this:

Make a healthy and delicious meal and sit down to enjoy it!
Create a daily ritual of self-care – morning and evening – include activities like meditation, journaling, a self-massage. Diffuse essential oils before getting into bed.
Plan activities that you really enjoy – museums, galleries, reading, walking or more time with friends.
4. Now, make a commitment and keep it.

We all want partners who live up to their word. Live up to yours!

5. Then, hit reply here and let me now how you are upping your self care routine! I will cheer you on and you will also be getting support and accountability in your plan.

There is nothing more irresistible to a partner than a woman who truly and deeply loves herself.

Become your own best lover and you may find the partner of your dreams feeling incredibly lucky to have you in their lives!